Roller Coaster Riding

 

You're thinking "Why did she post a photo of a package of bagels?"  Ya, I know I did it there is a point to the photo.

So yesterday I went and ran some errands, I have a love/hate relationship with errands these days. I used to go through the stores saying Hi or good morning to everyone I saw, now days I admit I almost avoid eye contact incase I see someone I know and they stop me to say how sorry they are. Hey, I totally get it and I do appreciate it but then that grief that I had tucked inside gets a chance to leak out. There are some places in the store that I'm more vulnerable to that . The deli, where I always bought Anders a 4" thick chunk of Havarti cheese for his fancy danish sandwiches, Oranges for awhile there during Chemo he ate 8 of those clementines everyday, theres a few other spots too but this time it was the bagels that bit me. I love Cinnamon/Raisin he hated them so I never bought them. So when I picked them up I had to stop and take a few deep breaths. Silly thing to tear up over bagels...

It was a dry warmish day yesterday so with Anders talking in my ear I knew I should get the car washed. Thing is I HATE the car wash, all last year or so I was going alone but I would always call him while I was there his voice has ALWAYS calmed me. So yep I had to buckle up and deal with it. I survived to tell the story and I know every time I go it will get easier.  My stop at Agway to get grain, minerals, salt and birdseed had no issues as he rarely went into there with me.  

I came home put away the groceries and packed up another box of stuff, I'm glad I have over a month to do this as I still am freaking out over how the transition is all going to happen. 

Pack up current home in U haul , less the things the buyers said they'll keep thankfully my bed so I will have a place to sleep that night!  Go to closing on current home thankfully new owners say okay leave the u haul till you can move it. *insert heart here   Go to closing on land , move u haul to land , when will camper get there? All depends on the weather, If the weather is nasty thankfully I can just stay in it where it sits until Ryan can move it.  Once its there I need to build some nice wooden steps to make it easier to get in and out of it.  Plug it in to the cabins electric current and take a deep breath! Then I'll have an electrician put in a dedicated RV plug outside the cabin along with an outlet to plug in some lights I can hang around to light up the area in front of the cabin at night for when I need to bring out the dogs, and have Freds come up to hitch the big propane tank to the camper for my stove and space heater. I'll also need to build a roost for my little chickens and an area where then can get there food but the goats can't since they'll be in the same area for now.  Although once again new owners say I can leave them as long as I need to *insert another big heart here. All the while my brain thinks of this paragraph as until I'm there I will wonder...

My brain got a break for a bit though when my family came up and got a Christmas tree from my neighbor and I decided I would too since she sells them for $25.00 so it will make a good snack for the goats later , yes I'm going to move a Christmas tree.  First time I have decorated one for years though as the girls have usually have done it, it was my wonderful son in laws birthday yesterday though so they had things to do . <3  I picked the colored lights because they seem more cheery to me than straight white, I wanted them to twinkle but for some reason I couldn't find the twinkle bulbs.  I just picked the first 20 ornaments I grabbed out of the box in no particular order and put Captain bear and Anders santa hat on top. Looking at it actually makes me smile which is a great thing!

Big storm coming tonight I guess into tomorrow could get a ton of heavy snow so I'm going to take it easy as I'll be shoveling the deck a lot ....wheeeee!